Tag: Mental Health

Anxiety: Recognizing the Symptoms

by Amy, posted in Mental Health

Many people think that Anxiety and Depression go hand in hand. While it possible to have both, they are completely different disorders.  Anxiety is not one simple thing. It is possible to feel anxious without having anxiety, but it’s better to check with a therapist or Doctor.

So, what do we know about Anxiety? It’s a stress response to something we perceive as dangerous. This is a natural response. I know what you’re thinking, how can something that is a natural response also be a disorder? The difference is the answer to the question, does it interfere with your life? If it’s yes, then you could have chronic anxiety.

Symptoms can vary and can fall into any of the following categories:

  • Behavioral
  • Emotional
  • Cognitive
  • Physical

Behavioral symptoms would include avoiding situations that cause fear and social withdrawal. Restlessness can also occur.

Feelings of impending doom or dread and excessive worry, apprehension, and fear are emotional symptoms.

Having difficulty thinking or incessant negative thoughts are the cognitive effects.

Physical symptoms include stomach and intestinal disorders, rapid heart rate, shaking, and dizziness.

Those with anxiety disorder would greatly benefit from developing coping mechanisms to help. 

  • Therapy is highly successful in learning how to spot negative behaviors and the thoughts behind them. Therapy can provide helpful tools that reduce stress and help keep anxiety at bay. Therapists can help with relaxation techniques. Many affordable meditation and relaxation apps are available.
  • Anti-anxiety medications and antidepressants can help with management of your symptoms.
  • Adopting a healthy lifestyle is a good long-term tool in keeping anxiety symptoms under control. Exercise, diet, and sleep are all good ideas in general, but essential for those suffering from anxiety.
  • Isolation can feed into anxiety. Having a strong support system can greatly benefit. Not everyone has family or friends that they can depend on. There are online support groups. A quick Google search will show you groups in your area or online ones you can join.

Learn what you can about anxiety. Many legitimate online resources exist, but talking with your doctor is the best.

You can always contact SAMSHA, the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration National Helpline at 1-800-662-4357.

Take care!

Depression and Getting Help

by Amy, posted in Mental Health

Depression is somewhat of a buzzword. People are very quick to self-diagnose themselves as having this disorder.  If you feel as though you may want to harm yourself or have suicidal thoughts, CONTACT A DOCTOR OR MENTAL HEALTH FACILITY IMMEDIATELY.

As a child of the 70s and 80s, no one had depression let alone got treatment for it. You were just sad, or moody. And yes, everyone can experience periods of depression as a result of an event or trauma. But if the feelings are overwhelming, lasting more than 6 months, and/or affect your day-to-day life, please seek the help of a doctor.

There are symptoms you may not even consider a part of depression. So here is a short list:

Problems concentrating

Changes in appetite

Pacing and fidgeting

Difficulty sleeping

Now, this is not all of the possible symptoms. But I don’t believe these to be what people would consider symptoms typical of depression.

Mood changes are prominent but may feel different than normal sadness. These changes may make you feel as if you are being almost consumed by them like you are in a hole that is so deep that there is no escape.

Despite the number of resources available, people just don’t understand what depression is. They may tell you to start feeling grateful for what you have. Maybe they will tell you that your life isn’t as bad as you think, or that you’re just a pessimist. All of which is very helpful (sarcasm).

If you have been experiencing any of these, or any other symptoms that are infringing on your life, please don’t be afraid to get help. You may need medication and that is ok. If you have pneumonia, you would seek medical treatment and no one would bat an eye. Your mental health is important. If you don’t feel as though you would receive support from those around you, then don’t share. You are allowed to take care of yourself without the input of others.

Here are some resources to help you:

988 National Mental Health Crisis Line

       Call or Text 988

       988lifeline.org

Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration

       www.samhsa.org

Take care of yourself.

Grief: why we react the way we do

by Amy, posted in Mental Health

Grief is a natural, if not painful, part of life. There are many emotions we experience when it comes to loss. Everyone grieves in a different way. You hear that, but what does it mean? Is there a specific way we are supposed to process our feelings? No, but maybe this will help you understand why you react the way you do.

For the sake of this blog, I am going to focus on the grief from death.

There are five stages of grief. If you Google this, you will find the number varies from 5 up to 12. Each stage can probably be broken down into more specific sub-stages, but we are going to focus on 5.

Know that these stages are not like a 12-step program. You don’t have to spend a particular amount of time on one and then move to the next. You could possibly remain in one stage while another is experiencing multiple stages at once. It is entirely possible that you do not encounter every stage. This is a personal journey.

My uncle died suddenly this past year and his wife moved down near my mom, it was her brother. She was worried that my aunt was not dealing with the loss. Mika, whose name was changed to protect the innocent, said to my mom “well, last night I think I cried for the first time since he passed. It looks like I finished that step.”

I find it important to stress that there is no order to this. It’s not pass/fail. It’s about coping, processing, and understanding why you are experiencing these issues.

  • Denial and Isolation

Denying loss is a natural reaction. When something bad happens, we don’t want to believe it. We may become so steadfast in our feelings that we choose to avoid people. Comfort is not always welcome because that means you have to come to terms with it. Most who offer comfort are doing so because they truly want to help. If you aren’t ready, then this gesture of goodwill can cause you pain.

  • Anger

This usually follows denial because once we have come to terms with the loss we are hurt. Hurt can become anger because we feel that the loss is not fair. Why did this have to happen? Could I have done something? The anger may not be toward yourself. Doctors are questioned if they could have done more. Many are angry at Higher Power; or however, you believe.  Why did they have to take your mother, grandfather, friend, pet? It’s easy to blame someone or something that cannot be confronted.

  • Bargaining

Have you ever cried out for something bad to happen to you rather than your loved one? “Take me instead!” This stage may happen before their death.  You are not in control and bargaining may be a way to get control back.

  • Depression

This is when the realization hits. We finally allow ourselves to feel the pain and the sadness. This is normal and is not to be confused with clinical depression. We will discuss that soon, but if you feel down to the point that it’s affecting your daily life and occurs for more than 6 months, please see a doctor. It is important that you understand that sadness is normal. If you don’t know, please contact your doctor or therapist.

  • Acceptance

You have finally come to terms with the loss. There is no time limit for grief. You may have accepted the loss but that does not mean that you are “over it”. Milestones often bring waves of grief: first birthday, Christmas, anniversary, and/or any other special occasion. Time heals all wounds as they say. The pain lessens, but not your love. I still cry sometimes when I think of my grandmother, and she died 27 years ago.

Before you freak out and say, “I didn’t feel anger (or sadness or bargaining)!” remember that there is no set order. If you feel that you cannot cope with a loss on your own, please reach out to someone. If you want, email me, remember that I am not a licensed therapist.

So that concludes this post. (My first actual post! Yay me!) I hoped that I gave you some information that you can use to help yourself, or someone close to you. And just know that if you reach out to someone to help and they are not receptive, it may mean that they are not ready to accept it. Don’t give up. Just do a quick “Hey, I’m just checking in to see how you are doing.”  It will mean more than you know.

Will it get easier?

by Amy, posted in Personal

“The laid schemes of mice and men often go awry” Source: To A Mouse by Robert Burns

There are variations of this quote with the most well-known being “The best-laid plans of mice and men”. However, you want to say it, the meaning remains, that we plan, or plot and scheme, but something happens to derail that goal. This is what happened to me.  I have planned, plotted, and worked on this site, but…well, you know the rest.

I thought I would start this with grief. At some point in our life, we have grieved. It’s not just the loss of people, but animals (pets), divorce, children leaving home, loss of a job, anything that is a big change in your life.

About 2 months ago, my beautiful, hyper yellow lab developed a cough. We took him to the vet and concluded it was not kennel cough since he was never around other dogs. Laryngeal paralysis was the diagnosis. This means that the folds in the larynx collapsed. He was put on medication and within 6 days he seemed fine. The cough never came back but he changed. He was lethargic and seemed to not want to eat unless it was something hand-fed. I was more than happy to hand feed him chicken, which worked, for a while. Then he was eating less each day and finally stopped. I looked up the medication and these were side effects, so I called the vet just to make sure. I was floored at the diagnosis. X-rays showed that he had an enlarged heart, was in kidney failure, critically anemic and his white blood count was through the roof. I asked how that all happened in a matter of weeks. He said that this heart disease is called the silent killer. They are fine until they aren’t.

We were given options, immediate hospitalization with at least 1 blood transfusion and flushing of kidneys. I asked if this would, not fix him, but at least get him back to a livable condition. He said there was a high chance he wouldn’t survive the procedures and if it were him, he would put him down. Shock is putting it mildly. I called my kids and husband and told them to come right away. I was willing to pay the money for the procedures, we all were, but I didn’t know how I would live with myself if he passed, and he was alone. I’m crying now just thinking about it. It’s hard when a pet cannot verbalize how he/she is feeling. This decision is not one to be made lightly. He was 6 years old. He shouldn’t be dealing with this.

As, I am sure, you can guess, we allowed our pup to have peace. It’s been about a month and a half without him and it’s hard. This is the 3rd dog I have had to put down in my life and it’s never easy. It’s so hard to not make the selfish decision.

I wanted to make this post separate from the one I am doing about grief. I wanted to share my story without chasing people away with a long read. tl:dr (too long, didn’t read)